Hidden Thoughts in Series 1

by Theodora McKee


Episode 1.1 "Trying To Connect You"

Assumpta:    I can't believe that I am this interested in the new priest! Not interested enough to go to church, but he does seem to be a decent sort of guy, even though he's English. When I picked him up on the road, I must admit I found him attractive, but I soon got rid of that thought when he told me he was the new priest. I can't imagine why he woke me up in the middle of the night to drive him up to the old Hassett place up on the mountain. I started to send him across to Ambrose. I mean, wouldn't that be more appropriate, to ask the Gard? But for some reason I didn't. I watched him give Last Rites to poor old Tommy, even though he had already died. He was so gentle with Mrs. Hassett that I was touched, in spite of myself. I did manage to tell him how I felt, personally, about all that mumbo jumbo. Still……

Peter:    Well, here I am, thrown into the middle of my new job. Ballykissangel is a lovely little town, and my church is beautiful. I think I will be happy here, in spite of finding that even a little place like this has a wheeler-dealer. I've gotten the nudge about being an Englishman from a number of people, including my new boss, Fa. MacAnally. My house is tiny and very suitable, even if it isn't really mine. Imagine a curate's house being bought by an entrepreneur! A very pretty girl gave me a lift into town, and was bitterly sarcastic, obviously not happy with the Church, with the English, with priests in general and particularly me! And yet, when I got a call to go to a dying man, she was the one I turned to for a lift. Got there too late, which made me feel terrible. I know his wife would have liked for him to have the sacrament. Assumpta (the girl) was pretty cruel about it; she finds it meaningless. But on the drive home, I felt she was more sympathetic. I guess I'll never see her in church. Still……

Episode 1.2 "The Things We Do For Love"    

Assumpta:    This snip of a girl came in to the pub; she'd reserved a room over the phone. I asked her if she'd come for the scenery and she said, "No, I've come for the priest." I had to restrain myself from smacking her pretty face. What a nerve! Peter's only been here a few weeks and she could easily ruin his reputation. Later that night, I saw her key still in its place, and since it was pouring rain, I thought I'd take it over to her. What did I see but the two of them cozying up over a candlelight supper. OOOH! What the hell do I care? I don't know, but I do! I've come to like Peter….well, as a friend of course. But what I felt was perilously close to jealousy. I don't know what happened, but Peter came in a while later, alone, and he used her room. Mmmmm. I'd love to know what went on there in his house. Peter and I worked out a deal to give that family in the caravan some money, betting the little I'd offered them on Cildargan to win the football match. It was really funny in a way; he was the reserve goalkeeper and lost the match! I couldn't resist teasing him about throwing the game. But anyway, that girl left, and we're back to what passes for normal here in Ballyk.

Peter:    I can't believe that Jenny came here! I thought I'd left all that behind when I left Manchester. She really got to me, asking if I was ashamed of the feelings I had for her. I am!  I never meant to give her the idea that there could be anything between us except friendship. I had to get away; I asked for the transfer, and I thought that would be the end of it. And here she is, still thinking we're going to go to bed together. Have an affair, at the least. I won't! I can't! I left her in my house and went to Fitzgerald's for the night. I think Assumpta guessed at the problem. In the middle of this, there's the trouble with the family in the caravan. But we came up with a plan to help Edso Foley and his family. Siobhan hinted that Cildargan could win the football match and we took a chance and bet the money Assumpta had offered the family to move on. I got to keep the goal when Ambrose got hurt, and I tried my best, but they won. Assumpta insisted that I'd thrown the game! As if I'd ever! We gave the winnings to the Foleys and they went off with enough money for a deposit on a house. Thank God. And thank God too that Jenny finally understood and decided to go back home. She said the strangest thing as she got on the bus, that there'd be a next time. I told her I'm a priest!  Anyway, she's gone, the Foleys are gone, and we're back to normal here in Ballyk.

Episode 1.3 "Live In My Heart And Pay No Rent"

Assumpta:    More excitement than usual in town. Just weeks before Niamh and Ambrose's wedding, Ambrose decided he had a vocation. Just imagining Ambrose a priest gave most of us hysterics, but not poor Niamh. I had to force Peter into taking action, suggesting he fiddle with the truth, anything to get that eejit back on track. He really is a good guy, Peter, not taking offense even when I say terrible things about the church and the priesthood. What a relief when Ambrose came in to the party. The "Not Quite a Wedding Reception". In the morning, Peter was sitting in the sun outside the pub watching me haul empty barrels, and it was comfortable teasing one another. Except I said something that made me blush! That if he was called out in the middle of the night, he'd wake me up to tell me. I mean, all I meant was that he had done that when Tommy Hassett was dying….but I had this sudden image of him nudging me in bed to tell me. Whew! I'm glad he didn't seem to take it that way. What is wrong with me?

Peter:    Ambrose a priest, what a thought! In spite of Father Mac, I felt I had to steer him away from such a ludicrous idea. Assumpta gave me the way out, suggesting that I lie to him about the statue that could have killed him. But it was more her analysis of what was really wrong that convinced me. A strange way of having cold feet, this conviction that God had spared him for a purpose.  Anyway, it did seem to work, and he and Niamh are back together. But I can't seem to put out of my mind something I told Ambrose—that a man who fears love, fears life. I seem to be spending too much time thinking about that these days—about what love and marriage can bring to life. Hey, I made that decision a long time ago! What is wrong with me?

Episode 1.4 "Fallen Angel"

Assumpta:    What got into me, offering to teach Peter to drive?  I can't imagine doing that for any other priest! But he is a good guy, and I like him, in spite of the collar. I could have killed him for almost wrecking my car, but it's hard to stay angry with him. We have this funny relationship, teasing and almost flirting! I wondered what was going on when the driving examiner seemed to think I was Peter's wife! I kept hearing that phrase—"your wife will find that amusing." "Your wife."  When Father Mac told him that Judge Bradley had died, he looked so devastated I had to restrain myself from putting my arms around him. I must be losing my mind!

Peter:    God certainly does work in mysterious ways. There are times when being a priest is a lonely business, and my birthday started out that way, but half the town came out to surprise me with a party. I guess it was Assumpta who put it together, and she offered to teach me to drive. Just in time, too, as I think Father Mac is going to try to use my lack of mobility as an excuse to get rid of me. Assumpta told me it was a "priest perk" around here to pass the driving test, and at first I didn't believe her. But Father Mac confirmed it, calling it "tradition". I was determined to pass it honestly if at all. In a short while, I became very fond of Judge Bradley, a patient at the hospital who got under my skin. He needled me about my commitment to the church, and yet there was sincerity in the man that I respected. It really shook me that he…well, facilitated his wife's death, but I had to ask myself what I would feel if the woman I loved were dying in such agony. I felt really bad that he died, but he left me such a gift! His car, a beautifully tended Javelin, just as I passed the test. Without the collar too. I keep remembering that the examiner assumed Assumpta was my wife! What a thought. I'd have to lose my mind!

Episode 1.5 "The Power And The Glory"

Assumpta:    Leo. I can't believe he turned up here, that he still has those old feelings for me, that he still thinks we can be together. I am so confused! It was nice to go out to dinner with him, to talk together like old times, but when he started to talk about "us", when he wanted to touch me….I recoiled. I once was in love with this man! What is the matter with me? I wanted him to leave, I wanted to just get back to my old life without this kind of distraction, but I also felt so sad saying goodbye to him. What did he mean by suggesting that something….someone….was keeping me here? There isn't anyone here for me! Is there?

Peter:    What a mishmash of events! Politics and bones, long-buried people, and Assumpta's old boyfriend. Leo struck me as not being right for her, too much of a manipulator. Do all reporters make news as well as reporting on it? He certainly cares for her, and I should appreciate that in him. But when he asked my advice, though I tried to be judicious and pastoral, I found myself wishing I could tell him to leave her alone, to go away. Then I saw how sad she looked when he was leaving, and I wished that I could go to her and offer…..what? Comfort? Consolation? An alternative? Searching myself, I wonder what kind of feelings I have for this woman. There isn't that kind of feeling, I'm sure! Or is there?

Episode 1.6 "Missing You Already"

Assumpta:    I have so much on my mind. Brian Quigley is really going to put me out of business. I'm shocked, furious, shaken. What will I do to make my living? I've worked so hard, and now this. I'm tired, bone tired. And yet the thing that seems foremost in my mind is Peter leaving. Why do I care? I'm not sure. I just know that the bottom seemed to fall out of my life when he told me he was being transferred. Well, if I can't do anything to stop Quigley, I can do something to stop Father Mac. I wrote up a petition, expressing support for Peter and asking that he be kept on as curate here in Ballyk. I gave it to Brendan to circulate at Niamh and Ambrose's wedding, most of the town will be there. After the wedding, and after the race—which Peter fixed so that I'd win—he looked so sad, sitting on Hendley's steps. I gave him the petition, and he started to cry when he saw what it was. I hope it works. He asked me a strange question. What about me? Did I want him to stay? I couldn't answer him, my heart just started to pound. Why? Why do I want him to stay?

Peter:    The bottom fell out of my life when Father Mac said I was being sent back to England. I like it here! This is the first place I've ever been where I feel so totally at home. I love my church, I love the town, I love the people. Father Mac said I was needed at home, but when I called Father Randall, he said he'd been told I wasn't fitting in. There's only one person who would have said that. Father Mac. I mean, what is his problem? Assumpta said it was because I rock the boat, letting people think for themselves. That's true; it is my approach to the priesthood, helping people to find their own morality. I was able to put my sadness aside to see if I could help Assumpta deal with Quigley's opening a competing bar, slashing prices, really trying, as she said, to put her out of business. Brian came up with the idea of a publican's race, betting their bars. Well, I couldn't let Assumpta lose her pub! Where would she go? So I stuck down the glasses on her tray, and she won the race. But Brian was also cheating, because he couldn't lose. Ambrose had shut him down. So I don't have to feel guilty. Just sad to leave this lovely place. Assumpta gave me a petition which most of the town had signed, asking that I stay! I felt overwhelmed, very pleased at this support. Maybe it will work, maybe not. But what I really want…need… to know is if Assumpta wants me to stay. Why do I care if she wants me to stay or not? I don't know. But…. Does she?