Review of Ballykissangel

Episode 2.8 "Chinese Whispers"

Episode Written by Rio Fanning


The episode title made no sense to me at first, not being familiar with British usage, so after thinking about it for a really long time (about five seconds), I decided that Chinese whispers are unfounded rumours, which is probably politically incorrect and additionally makes about as much sense to me as the Chinese fire drill (a pointless exercise in which one of the occupants of a car which is stopped at a red light, cries out, "Chinese fire drill!" and everyone is expected to jump out of the car, run around it, get back in and take another seat before the light turns green). But then I asked someone who is actually from England, and she said that "Chinese Whispers" is the party game which in my childhood in the American Midwest was called "Telephone" (one person is given a message, which he or she then whispers to the next person, and then that person whispers it to the next person, and so on, until the last person, who says the message out loud to uproarious laughter, as it is usually quite different from the original message.). Still, even with the correct definition, I don't think that this episode was quite like a game of Chinese Whispers, since the person who had the original "message" (Ambrose) never let a word drop about the real purpose of the two visitors, and nobody passed on any information which was misunderstood. I think my own interpretation of the title is more accurate. So there.

I liked this episode very much the first time I saw it, finding the whole build-up of suspense and suspicion masterful, but on my second, frame-by-frame viewing (for transcription purposes), I found it to be slow and lacking in humour. Yeah, yeah, frame-by-frame does tend to slow down the action just a tad, but I've transcribed 16 episodes (as of this writing) and this is the first one I've felt this way about. This is also the first episode written by Rio Fanning which I've taken a closer look at, so maybe it has something to do with his writing, which doesn't seem to be going for the quick laugh--very few stand-alone clever lines in the entire episode--but works more toward overall story development.

This episode is unusual in another way, in that there aren't just three or four more or less separate plots. Instead, I'd say there are four main plots and two lesser ones, all of which are intrinsically tied together. There are very few episodes I've seen in which the writer managed to achieve such a close-knit interaction among plots. Episode 3.12 Amongst Friends is necessarily another one, although I wouldn't quite put this episode in quite the same league.

The six plots are:

1. The "Revenue" Men
2. Duty Free
3. Double Booking
4. Niamh's Expecting Again
5. The Peace Commissioner
6. The Wine Bar


The "Revenue" Men

This plot was the real driving force behind the entire episode, and the inspiraton for the title, as described above. I found the "revenue men" to be...inscrutable. Their motives were opaque throughout. Were they really just looking for a diversion in the form of golf, while they waited for their tip to pay off? Or were they trying to strike fear into the hearts of the populace?

Clearly, the answer has to be that they were behaving as evil, evil proteges of the Marquis de Sade after the scene in which their tip-off came. (The bald one's gleeful suggestion of, "Why don't we head back to the pub, and worry the natives?") But before that, I am just not sure. The whole candy bar and matches thing at Kathleen's... Trying to trick Peter into serving them alcohol... Pocketing the note from Black Dazzler. Those all speak for the agents of Lucifer theory. On the other hand, the one fraud investigator seemed genuinely curious as to whom they might have upset when Peter confronted them in the pub, and then the bald man delivered the wonderful line: "Guilt and sin...The world is full of it." Meaning that those who have sinned are producing their own guilty consciences, which is exactly what happened:

  • Eamonn felt guilty for using agricultural diesel fuel in his car (and well he should, since it is illegal).
  • Assumpta felt guilty for having bought liquor from a smuggler (again, deservedly so).
  • Brian felt guilty for having avoided paying VAT and whatever other shady business practices he had going (ditto).
  • Kathleen felt guilty for possibly not having dotted all the i's in her accounts books (hope Cathal wasn't her accountant, too! But most likely she hadn't actually done anything wrong, she's just so indoctrinated with Catholic guilt that she didn't know how else to feel).
  • Fr Mac felt...well, not exactly guilty for having encouraged Brendan to lie on his tax return...let us say he felt culpable.
  • Brendan felt guilty for having fudged on said tax return. Well, who hasn't fiddled their tax? Interesting that Brendan's the only one who felt guilty about it.
  • Padraig also didn't feel guilty about doing small appliance repairs under the table, but he did own up to its being illegal and stopped doing it for the duration.
  • Interesting that it took two complete strangers to bring about these reactions. Wouldn't that be Ambrose's job? Shouldn't the constant presence of a uniformed member of the gardai be a deterrent to crime? In actual fact, even though Tom and Jerry (as the two agents were credited, although never named in the broadcast episode) had not come to town to investigate any of the above cases (or any of the dozens of unnamed frauds being perpetrated in our favorite little community...how about Dr. Ryan's little drug ring? Not to mention Siobhan's taking cash-in-hand payments!), they would have had the jurisdiction to bring charges against Brian or any of the others, so the great relief which everyone felt at Siobhan's announcement that they were not tax men, was misplaced. They were right to be nervous. As Donal so rightly put it, "If you're doing anything, stop it!"


    Duty Free

    What was she thinking? Desperate times call for desperate measures, I guess. I liked the fact that Peter got all bent out of shape when Assumpta told him what she had done, but that he ended up helping her and covering for her after all. I'm wondering, though, where he saw the moral high ground in his stance, or whether he was just trying to spite the revenue men, who had really started acting out and out smarmy. (See above.) And although Peter's gone out on a limb for Assumpta before in her business dealings (see Episode 1.6 Missing You Already re: the Bar and Grill), this time he wasn't playing favorites, since he also, in the same breath, agreed to cover for Brendan. He would have done the same for anyone, was the implication.

    Double Booking

    Oh Brian. Brian, Brian, Brian. I didn't think you would stoop so low as to keep a double set of accounts books! Attempting to fix a beauty pageant, "extending" closing hours on his Bar and Grill, all peanuts in comparison. I mean, this is actual crime, with prison time attached! No wonder he was stiff as a board when the two agents got within sniffing distance of his ledgers. He must have been sweating bullets.

    Peter, though, was brilliantly cool in the face of trouble. He took that note from Black Dazzler without so much as batting an eye. I guess he'd passed through that particular temptation earlier.

    I like Brian's having a nemesis in a recurring role. It was an especially nice touch to have Brian suggest that Assumpta have another poker tournament to raise money for the repairs to her pipes, in that that Mossy Phelan's defeat at the tournament was likely the reason behind his plot for revenge on Brian. I was surprised, however, that Brian didn't recognize Mossy Phelan's voice earlier. He wasn't using any of the standard thug methods of disguising his voice, such as covering the mouthpiece with a handkerchief.

    I was a little uncomfortable with the loose end of Brian's accountant (what the heck kind of a name is Cathal, anyway?). He was stopped by the police, presumably relating to the inquiry into Sean Dooley's (oops, almost wrote Dillon there!) misdeeds, and then we never heard anything more about him. Were all of his files confiscated? Was he able to deliver the "corrected" books to Brian? Was the accountant himself indicted? What repercussions would that have had for Brian?


    Niamh's Expecting Again

    Once again, Niamh got the range of emotions just right: first trepidation, then burgeoning hopefulness, then utter joy.  Not much more to say about this story, other than that it provided a very tidy out for Assumpta and her illegal beer.

    The Peace Commissioner

    After Kieran Prendiville, a big thank you to Rio Fanning for the lesson in Irish culture. I didn't know that there was such a thing as a peace commissioner. No, I didn't. The closest thing I can think of in the U.S. is Judge Judy. Apparently they don't have such a thing in England, either.

    Another loose end I'm fretting about: Did Siobhan run for peace commissioner or not? Just because Dooley was indicted (and later incarcerated, as I'm sure we all rememer), is no reason for Siobhan to back out.


    The Wine Bar

    You can tell this episode aired during the internet boom of the 1990's. A wine bar is not exactly a recession-proof endeavour. A good old well-established neighbourhood pub is much more the thing for down-on-their luck working stiffs. Like Fitzgerald's, come to think of it, only the customer base (tourists) is so darned seasonal.

    The main point of this story was to provide a reason for many angst-filled moments for Peter. I was surprised that Peter got so carried away when talking to Niamh about Assumpta, with that "different kinds of love" line. And Niamh, uncharacteristically, didn't seem at all intrigued by that comment. Maybe she was too wrapped up in her own bliss.

    Then there was the kitchen scene with Peter and Assumpta, in which he delivered the climactic line, "I care about you, Assumpta," and to which she had no response. What was she feeling at that moment? Did she want to say, "I care about you, too," but just didn't have the nerve?

    I'm also dying to know what the end of his sentence was meant to be: "I just thought that we--" ...had a special understanding? ...were more than just friends? ...weren't supposed to leave until the end of Series 3? And then I was just crushed, as I'm sure Peter was, that Assumpta wasn't more moved by his obvious plea. She just brusquely said, "You'll all know what I'm going to do, OK?" and then brushed past him out of the kitchen, instantly able to recover her composure. Peter clearly had a lot more trouble with it, as he bumbled around and stuttered and mumbled on his way out.

    And finally, the final scene, in which Peter and Assumpta are alone in the corner, watching Niamh and Ambrose dance. The exchange speaks for itself:

    Peter: Is that what you are looking for Assumpta?
    Assumpta: No. No, no, I-- I don't know what I'm looking for. Anyway I'm not likely to find it here. Am I?
    Peter: You can find it anywhere.
    Assumpta: Do you believe everything you hear?
    Peter: Why not? I'm a man of faith, aren't I?
    I have nothing to add. Excuse me while I reach for the Kleenex.

    Random Thoughts/Nitpicks/Unanswered Questions

  • Best line: If you're doing anything...stop it!

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  • Activity I would least liked to have helped with: Scraping the bottoms of the pews. It's not the chewing gum that would bother me so much...

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  • Peter licks his lips when:

  •  - ...he is thinking about what Ambrose suggested about Assumpta leaving town.
     - ...he and Assumpta have their conversation in the kitchen (twice).
     
  • Weirdest scene: The "Three Lovely Lassies From Banion" sing-along. All I can think of is, those two fraud agents must have been awfully bored to have put up with that one.

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  • Most heartbreaking line:
  • Niamh: I'm putting you down for the christening Father.
    Peter: I'll be honored.
  • Does Niamh ever actually ride that bicycle?

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  • Why did Assumpta's friend have to write to her about opening the wine bar? Why couldn't she call?

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  • Brian told Assumpta that she'd only have cold water until the repairs were completed, and that in addition her toilets wouldn't flush for the duration, but that that shouldn't stop her from opening the pub. Now, isn't there some sort of ordinance that says that toilets in a public house must flush in order to maintain proper hygiene? Where is Ambrose's Eagle Eye enforcement on this one? And on the same note, if cold water is flowing through the pipes, why are the pipes leading to the toilet tanks in particular excluded? Or do Assumpta's toilets flush with hot water? It'd kill more bacteria, but make sure your bum's well covered when you flush!

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  • Did we have to be treated to Padraig's musings on the state of his personal plumbing apparatus?

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  • When Niamh wants to call Ambrose after Brian's safe has been robbed, she hurries off to the left, presumably to the nearest phone. But Brian stops her and then hurries off to the right, where he picks up the phone to call his accountant. So which phone was Niamh heading for?

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  • Nice parallelism with both Brian and Sean insisting on "cash in hand" transactions.

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  • Brian must be a very small businessman if he considers 2,000 pounds a "lot of money".

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  • Didn't you wonder about Cathal being both Brian's *and* Sean's accountant?

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  • Cathal thinks that the *government* broke into Brian's house and stole his accounts books? Talk about paranoid...

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  • Um, what was Donal carrying in that sack with the antlers sticking out?

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  • Likely editing error: Niamh entered Dr. Ryan's office...then she and Peter had the conversation in the kitchen with "different kinds of love"...then Niamh was in Dr. Ryan's office and he was telling her she was pregnant. A pregnancy test doesn't take so long that she would have had to go home in between.


  • Review by Margaret Pattison